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Ted

Ted

Comedy · Fantasy · 2012

John Bennett, a man whose childhood wish of bringing his teddy bear to life came true, now must decide between keeping the relationship with the bear or his girlfriend, Lori.

Movie details

Ted

“Ted is coming.”

2012 Comedy · Fantasy 1h 47m

Critical arithmetic

One number, for now.

TMDB

6.5 / 10

Community rating

John Bennett, a man whose childhood wish of bringing his teddy bear to life came true, now must decide between keeping the relationship with the bear or his girlfriend, Lori.

CriticWise case file

What this film says about your taste.

Not a recommendation score. A measure of how closely the film’s taste signals resemble yours.

The archetype split

Who fights over Ted?

The split comes from the same five-axis model used by the test, not audience ratings or review sentiment.

Taste neighbourhood

Nearby on the taste map.

TMDB supplies the candidates. CriticWise reorders them by craft, strangeness, prestige, emotion, and pace.

Ted 2

Ted 2

Comedy · 2015

Newlywed couple Ted and Tami-Lynn want to have a baby, but in order to qualify to be a parent, Ted will have to prove he's a person in a court of law.

How High

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Jamal and Silas, two ordinary guys who smoke something magical, pass their college entrance exams with flying colors and end up at Harvard. Ivy League ways are strange but Silas and Jamal take it in a stride -- until their supply of supernatural smoke runs dry. That's when they have to start living by their wits and rely on their natural resources to make the grade.

How to Murder Your Wife

How to Murder Your Wife

Comedy · 1965

Stanley Ford is a successful cartoonist and happily single. That is, until he gets drunk at a friend's bachelor party and impulsively proposes to the beautiful woman who pops out of the cake. Once sober, he regrets the decision, but she won't agree to a divorce. Stanley jokingly vents his frustrations in his comic strip by having the main character kill his wife. But when his actual wife goes missing and Stanley is arrested for her murder, he has a change of heart.

Jimmy Carr: Natural Born Killer

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Jimmy Carr refutes the idea that you can't joke about anything these days with his edgy takes on gun control, religion, cancel culture and consent.

The Climb

The Climb

Comedy · 2020

Kyle and Mike are best friends who share a close bond — until Mike sleeps with Kyle’s fiancée. A stormy but enduring relationship ensues between Kyle, with limitless patience, and Mike, who only lives his life by sowing discord in that of others, across many years of laughter, heartbreak, and rage.

The Super

The Super

Comedy · 1991

Louie Kritski is a heartless landlord who has been so negligent in keeping up his ghetto apartment that he is threatened with jail time. The judge gives him another option -- he must live in his rat-infested hell hole until he brings it up to liveable standards.

Babes

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After getting pregnant from a one-night stand, a single woman leans on her married best friend and mother of two to guide her through gestation and beyond.

Me Time

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Comedy · 2022

With his family away, a devoted stay-at-home dad enjoys his first me time in years by joining his hard-partying old friend on a wild birthday adventure.

Pretty Persuasion

Pretty Persuasion

Comedy · 2005

A 15-year-old girl incites chaos among her friends and a media frenzy when she accuses her drama teacher of sexual harassment.

Dave Chappelle: The Unstoppable...

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Comedy · 2025

Facing a world gone sideways, comedy icon Dave Chappelle delivers bold truths and potent punchlines in this no-holds-barred special.

Where it lives

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Names above the title

The people responsible.

Directed by

Seth MacFarlane

Written by

Seth MacFarlane · Alec Sulkin · Wellesley Wild

Mark Wahlberg

Mark Wahlberg

John Bennett

Mila Kunis

Mila Kunis

Lori Collins

Seth MacFarlane

Seth MacFarlane

Ted (voice)

Joel McHale

Joel McHale

Rex

Giovanni Ribisi

Giovanni Ribisi

Donny

Patrick Warburton

Patrick Warburton

Guy

Matt Walsh

Matt Walsh

Thomas

Court is in session

Put Ted on trial.

Two incompatible taste archetypes. One film. Read the arguments, then issue a completely binding cultural ruling.

The defence The Popcorn Loyalist

“It owes the canon nothing.”

The movie pursues immediacy and audience pleasure without begging institutions to certify its worth.

The prosecution The Big-Idea Head

“Easy pleasure, short half-life.”

It moves efficiently through the moment but offers little reason to keep arguing once the credits end.