The defence The Adrenaline Seeker
“Momentum is a formal choice.”
The velocity sharpens instinct and tension, making every beat land before self-importance can settle in.
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The Crimson Pirate
Adventure · Comedy · 1952
Burt Lancaster plays a pirate with a taste for intrigue and acrobatics who involves himself in the goings on of a revolution in the Caribbean in the late 1700s. A light hearted adventure involving prison breaks, an oddball scientist, sailing ships, naval fights and tons of swordplay.
Movie details
The Crimson Pirate
“MAN OF NINE LIVES AND 1000 SURPRISES!”
1952 Adventure · Comedy 1h 45m
Critical arithmetic
One number, for now.
Scores change. Arguments endure.
TMDB
7.0 / 10
Community rating
Burt Lancaster plays a pirate with a taste for intrigue and acrobatics who involves himself in the goings on of a revolution in the Caribbean in the late 1700s. A light hearted adventure involving prison breaks, an oddball scientist, sailing ships, naval fights and tons of swordplay.
CriticWise case file
What this film says about your taste.
Not a recommendation score. A measure of how closely the film’s taste signals resemble yours.
The archetype split
Who fights over The Crimson Pirate?
For the defence
The Adrenaline Seeker
“If it slows down, you check your phone.”
Read their case For the prosecution
The Cool Ironist
“Feeling things is a little embarrassing.”
Read their objectionThe split comes from the same five-axis model used by the test, not audience ratings or review sentiment.
Taste neighbourhood
Nearby on the taste map.
TMDB supplies the candidates. CriticWise reorders them by craft, strangeness, prestige, emotion, and pace.
Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl
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When wily pirate Captain Barbossa seizes Jack Sparrow’s beloved ship, the Black Pearl, and kidnaps the governor’s daughter, Elizabeth Swann, blacksmith Will Turner reluctantly teams up with the unpredictable pirate Jack to rescue her—only to uncover a terrifying curse that turns Barbossa’s crew into the undead.
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest
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Captain Jack Sparrow’s got a blood debt to pay: he owes his soul to the legendary Davy Jones, ghastly Ruler of the Ocean Depths. To escape eternal servitude aboard the Flying Dutchman, ever-crafty Jack must track down the still-beating heart of Jones. But he won’t do it alone: Will Turner and Elizabeth Swann are drawn back into another one of his perilous quests—assuming they can evade execution for aiding a pirate.
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End
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After losing Captain Jack Sparrow to the locker of Davy Jones, Will Turner, Elizabeth Swann, and Captain Barbossa journey to the ends of the earth to rescue him. And as the East India Trading Company tightens its grip on the seas under Lord Cutler Beckett—now in control of Davy Jones—the fate of piracy hangs by a thread. Now, they must unite the pirate lords for one final stand. But as loyalties are tested and alliances shift, each must ultimately choose where they stand in the battle for freedom on the high seas.
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Monster Hunter
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A portal transports Cpt. Artemis and an elite unit of soldiers to a strange world where powerful monsters rule with deadly ferocity. Faced with relentless danger, the team encounters a mysterious hunter who may be their only hope to find a way home.
Pirates
Adventure · 1986
The adventures of pirate Captain Red and his first mate Frog.
Flash Gordon
Sci-fi · 1980
A football player and his mates travel to the planet Mongo and find themselves fighting the tyranny of Ming the Merciless to save Earth.
Nate and Hayes
Adventure · 1983
Nathaniel Williamsen is taken to an island mission with his fiancee Sophie. Their ship, the Rona, is captained by the roguish Bully Hayes, who also takes a liking to Sophie. When Sophie is kidnapped by slave trader Ben Pease "Nate" teams with Hayes in order to find her.
John Carter
Action · 2012
John Carter is a war-weary, former military captain who's inexplicably transported to the mysterious and exotic planet of Barsoom (Mars) and reluctantly becomes embroiled in an epic conflict. It's a world on the brink of collapse, and Carter rediscovers his humanity when he realizes the survival of Barsoom and its people rests in his hands.
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales
Adventure · 2017
Thrust into an all-new adventure, a down-on-his-luck Capt. Jack Sparrow feels the winds of ill-fortune blowing even more strongly when deadly ghost sailors led by his old nemesis, the evil Capt. Salazar, escape from the Devil's Triangle. Jack's only hope of survival lies in seeking out the legendary Trident of Poseidon, but to find it, he must forge an uneasy alliance with a brilliant and beautiful astronomer and a headstrong young man in the British navy.
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Names above the title
The people responsible.
Cast & crew
Directed by
Robert Siodmak
Written by
Roland Kibbee
Burt Lancaster
Capt. Vallo (The Crimson Pirate)
Nick Cravat
Ojo
Eva Bartok
Consuelo
Torin Thatcher
Humble Bellows
James Hayter
Prof. Prudence
Leslie Bradley
Baron Jose Gruda
Margot Grahame
Bianca
Court is in session
Put The Crimson Pirate on trial.
Two incompatible taste archetypes. One film. Read the arguments, then issue a completely binding cultural ruling.
The prosecution The Cool Ironist
“Speed as an alibi.”
The film races past its weak spots and hopes acceleration will keep the audience from inspecting the evidence.